Throughout history, some individuals have delivered sharp and memorable comebacks that have left lasting impressions. These witty remarks often reveal the speaker’s quick thinking and cleverness. Let’s explore some of these historical zingers and the stories behind them.
Renowned film critic Roger Ebert was known for his candid reviews, but his critique of the 1996 crime comedy “Mad Dog Time” stands out. Ebert famously stated that watching the film was less enjoyable than staring at a blank screen for the same duration. He humorously suggested that the movie should be repurposed into free ukulele picks for the poor, highlighting his disdain for the film.
At a bustling bar in Key West, Florida, author Truman Capote was approached by a woman seeking his autograph. Her intoxicated husband, however, rudely demanded Capote autograph a more personal item. Capote’s response was both witty and cutting: “I don’t know if I can autograph it, but perhaps I can initial it.”
In Victorian society, “Vinegar Valentines” were a popular way to send humorous insults. These cards featured clever rhymes aimed at unwanted admirers or poor singers. One card, titled “You Are a Nerve Destroyer,” compared a person’s singing to the unpleasant sounds of a pig’s slaughter.
While Elizabeth Taylor was known for her love of animals, she once remarked in an interview that some of her best leading men were dogs and horses. This comment, though seemingly affectionate, carried a pointed undertone.
Virginia Woolf was not shy about expressing her opinions on literature. In a 1922 diary entry, she criticized James Joyce’s “Ulysses,” comparing it to “a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.” Her vivid imagery conveyed her lack of appreciation for the novel’s later chapters.
The rivalry between writers Gore Vidal and Norman Mailer was legendary. During a 1971 appearance on the Dick Cavett Show, Mailer made a snide remark about Vidal’s writing. Vidal’s retort, “What did you say? I wasn’t listening,” showcased his ability to dismiss Mailer’s insult with ease.
Authors H.G. Wells and Henry James had a contentious relationship. James once described Wells as having “so much talent with so little art.” In response, Wells satirized James’s work in his novel “Boon,” likening it to a church without a congregation.
In 1947, William Faulkner ranked himself second among contemporary writers, placing Thomas Wolfe first. He criticized Ernest Hemingway for lacking courage in his writing, suggesting Hemingway never used challenging words. Faulkner’s sharp critiques extended to Mark Twain, whom he initially dismissed as a hack writer before later acknowledging Twain’s genius.
Mark Twain was famously critical of Jane Austen’s work. In a letter, he admitted his intense dislike for her novels, stating that reading “Pride and Prejudice” made him want to “dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin bone.”
Theodore Roosevelt was known for his vivid descriptions of contemporaries. He called Henry James a “little emasculated mass of inanity” and described William Howard Taft as a “puzzle wit with a fat head.” Roosevelt’s assessments were often as colorful as they were biting.
Journalists have long been known for their sharp critiques of politicians. In 1936, H.L. Mencken wrote a scathing article about Franklin Roosevelt, suggesting he would support cannibalism for votes. George Orwell criticized Prime Minister Stanley Baldwin for mishandling foreign policy, while Dorothy Parker famously quipped, “How can they tell?” upon hearing of Calvin Coolidge’s death.
Dorothy Parker’s sharp wit extended to her theater reviews. Of the Broadway musical “Girl on Mine,” she suggested it was a perfect show for knitting, implying it was less than engaging.
Mariah Carey made headlines with her remark about Jennifer Lopez, simply stating, “I don’t know her.” This comment has since become a meme, embraced by Carey as part of her legacy.
These historical comebacks remind us of the power of words and the impact of a well-timed retort. Whether humorous or biting, these remarks continue to entertain and inspire.
Research the historical context behind one of the comebacks mentioned in the article. Write a short essay explaining the social, political, or personal circumstances that may have influenced the speaker’s response. Consider how the comeback reflects the values or tensions of the time.
Design a modern “Vinegar Valentine” card using digital tools or traditional art supplies. Choose a contemporary figure or situation to satirize, and craft a witty rhyme or message. Share your creation with the class and discuss the effectiveness of humor in social commentary.
Participate in a debate on the role of criticism in art and literature. Divide into two groups: one supporting the idea that sharp critiques, like those from Virginia Woolf or Roger Ebert, are essential for progress, and the other arguing that they can be detrimental. Use examples from the article to support your arguments.
Choose a current event or public figure and write a clever comeback or retort that could be used in a conversation or social media post. Ensure your response is both respectful and impactful. Share your comeback with classmates and discuss the elements that make it effective.
Research a famous literary rivalry not mentioned in the article. Prepare a presentation that outlines the key events and exchanges between the writers involved. Discuss how these rivalries may have influenced their work and public perception.
Here’s a sanitized version of the provided YouTube transcript:
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Roger Ebert critiqued numerous films during his decades as a film critic, but his review of Larry Bishop’s 1996 crime comedy “Mad Dog Time,” featuring a cast that included Jeff Goldblum and Ellen Barkin, might be his most memorable takedown. He wrote that “Mad Dog Time” is the first movie he has seen that does not improve on the sight of a blank screen viewed for the same length of time. Watching it is like waiting for a bus in a city where you’re not sure they have a bus line. It gets better, and by better, he obviously means worse. Ebert concluded his critique with a suggestion that “Mad Dog Time” should be cut into free ukulele picks for the poor.
Hi, I’m Erin McCarthy, editor-in-chief of Mental Floss, and welcome to the List Show. At some point in your life, a well-meaning adult has probably shared the adage, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Fortunately for our purposes, many people seem to have missed that memo or outright ignored it. Today, I’m covering some of history’s sharpest comebacks, from Truman Capote’s witty response to an inappropriate request to Virginia Woolf’s comparison of James Joyce’s “Ulysses” to pimple popping. Let’s get started.
One night at a packed bar in Key West, Florida, a woman approached Truman Capote and asked him to autograph her napkin. He was happy to oblige, but the request irritated her inebriated husband. He staggered over to Capote’s table and, after unzipping his trousers, said, “Since you’re autographing things, why don’t you autograph this?” A hush fell over the area as other patrons waited to see how Capote would respond. He didn’t disappoint: “I don’t know if I can autograph it,” he said, “but perhaps I can initial it.”
Behind the posh facade of Victorian society were certain impolite customs, like “Vinegar Valentines.” These cards featured clever rhymes that insulted anyone from an unwanted admirer to the worst singer on your street. One card titled “You Are a Nerve Destroyer” included lines that compared a person’s singing to the sounds made during a pig’s slaughter.
Elizabeth Taylor never sent a caustic holiday card to any male co-star, but she did express in a 1981 interview that some of her best leading men had been dogs and horses. While Taylor was a lifelong animal lover, her comment seemed rather pointed.
Virginia Woolf was more than pointed when criticizing James Joyce’s “Ulysses.” In a 1922 diary entry, she expressed that while the first few chapters amused her, the rest left her puzzled and bored, comparing it to “a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.” This sentiment was shared with fellow writer Lynne Streichi, where she described certain chapters as merely “the scratching of pimples on the body of the boot boy at Claridge’s.”
Gore Vidal and Norman Mailer had a famously contentious relationship, culminating in a verbal sparring match on the Dick Cavett Show in 1971. Vidal had previously accused Mailer of misogyny, and during the show, Mailer quipped, “It’s hard when you have a lot in your head to write something that’s true.” Vidal’s retort was, “What did you say? I wasn’t listening.” Their feud turned physical on more than one occasion.
H.G. Wells and Henry James also had a fraught relationship. In a 1921 letter, James described Wells as having “so much talent with so little art.” Wells, in turn, critiqued James’s work in his satirical novel “Boon,” likening it to a church lit without a congregation.
In 1947, William Faulkner was asked to rank the leading writers of the era and placed himself second, behind Thomas Wolfe. He described Ernest Hemingway as lacking courage and never using a word that might challenge the reader. Faulkner had previously criticized Mark Twain, calling him a hack writer, though he later recognized Twain’s genius.
Mark Twain himself had some harsh words for Jane Austen, expressing his disdain in a letter where he admitted he couldn’t critique her work because he loathed it so much. He famously wrote that every time he read “Pride and Prejudice,” he wanted to “dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin bone.”
Theodore Roosevelt had a way with words when it came to his contemporaries, labeling Henry James a “little emasculated mass of inanity” and calling William Howard Taft a “puzzle wit with a fat head.” His assessments were often colorful and biting.
Journalists have also roasted politicians over the years. In 1936, H.L. Mencken wrote an article criticizing Franklin Roosevelt, suggesting he would support cannibalism if it would get him votes. The piece was so inflammatory that Roosevelt was asked for a response at a press conference.
George Orwell had similarly harsh words for Prime Minister Stanley Baldwin, stating he “royally botched” the country’s foreign policy. Critic Dorothy Parker had her own feelings about Calvin Coolidge, remarking upon his taciturn nature, famously quipping, “How can they tell?” upon hearing of his death.
The creators of the Broadway musical “Girl on Mine” likely heard Parker’s less-than-glowing review, where she suggested it was a perfect show for knitting.
Mariah Carey also made headlines with her remark about Jennifer Lopez, stating simply, “I don’t know her.” This comment has since become a meme, and Carey has embraced it as part of her legacy.
This video may have been a lot of fun or a well-crafted critique. Comment below with the best compliment you’ve ever received or a great burn you’ve heard. Thanks for watching!
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This version maintains the essence of the original transcript while removing any inappropriate language or content.
Comebacks – Quick, witty, or sharp responses often used in dialogue to showcase a character’s intelligence or humor. – In Oscar Wilde’s plays, the characters are known for their clever comebacks that keep the audience entertained.
Literature – Written works, especially those considered of superior or lasting artistic merit. – Studying literature allows students to explore diverse cultures and historical periods through the lens of storytelling.
Critique – A detailed analysis and assessment of a literary work, often evaluating its strengths and weaknesses. – The professor’s critique of the novel highlighted its innovative narrative structure and thematic depth.
Humor – The quality of being amusing or entertaining, often used in literature to engage readers and provide relief from serious themes. – Mark Twain’s use of humor in “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” helps to address complex social issues in an accessible way.
Wit – The ability to use words in a clever and humorous way, often found in literary dialogue and prose. – Jane Austen’s novels are celebrated for their wit, which adds a layer of sophistication to her social commentary.
Reviews – Evaluations or assessments of a literary work, typically published in journals or media outlets, offering opinions on its quality and impact. – The reviews of the new novel were overwhelmingly positive, praising its innovative approach to storytelling.
Authors – Individuals who write books, articles, or other texts, contributing to the field of literature with their unique voices and perspectives. – Renowned authors like Toni Morrison and Gabriel García Márquez have left an indelible mark on world literature.
Remarks – Comments or observations made about a literary work, often providing insight or prompting further discussion. – The professor’s remarks on the symbolism in the poem sparked a lively debate among the students.
History – The study of past events, often explored in literature to provide context or enrich narratives with historical settings and themes. – Historical novels offer readers a glimpse into the past, blending factual history with imaginative storytelling.
Writing – The act or process of composing text, which can range from creative fiction to academic essays, each with its own conventions and styles. – Effective writing in literature requires a balance of creativity, clarity, and attention to language.
