ClassX Video Lessons How to Persuade Others with the Right Questions: Jedi Mind Tricks from Daniel H. Pink
Imagine you’re a parent with a teenage daughter named Maria, whose room looks like a tornado hit it. You want her to clean it, but how do you convince her? You could try bribing or threatening her, but those tactics only work temporarily. Instead, there’s a more effective approach from the counseling world called motivational interviewing, developed by Mike Pantalon of Yale University. This technique involves asking two simple yet powerful questions.
First, ask Maria, “On a scale of one to ten, with one meaning ‘I’m not ready at all’ and ten meaning ‘I’m ready to do it right now,’ how ready are you to clean your room?” Given the state of her room, Maria might respond with a low number, like a two.
Here’s where the second question comes into play: “Why didn’t you pick a lower number?” This question is counterintuitive but crucial. Instead of pressuring Maria to choose a higher number, you’re encouraging her to reflect on why she didn’t choose a one. This prompts Maria to articulate her own reasons for considering cleaning her room, such as wanting to be more organized or to find things more easily.
When individuals express their own reasons for doing something, they tend to believe in those reasons more deeply and are more likely to follow through. This principle is fundamental in sales and persuasion. If Maria says she’s a one, the conversation shifts slightly. You ask, “What can we do to make you a two?” This question helps identify any obstacles preventing her from taking action, such as needing help to get started or having other responsibilities that take up her time.
While this example focuses on parenting, motivational interviewing can be applied in various situations. Whether you’re trying to persuade your boss, a potential client, or a neighbor, the key is to help them uncover their own motivations. Persuasion isn’t about imposing your will on others; it’s about facilitating a process where people discover their own reasons for change.
The essence of motivational interviewing is understanding that motivation is something people generate for themselves. As a persuader, your role is to create an environment where individuals can explore and express their motivations. This approach is more effective because it empowers people to take ownership of their decisions.
In summary, motivational interviewing is a powerful tool for persuasion. By asking the right questions and helping others find their own reasons for change, you can foster genuine motivation and achieve more lasting results.
Pair up with a classmate and take turns playing the roles of the persuader and the person being persuaded. Use the scenario of convincing someone to adopt a healthier lifestyle. Practice using the two key questions from motivational interviewing to explore motivations and barriers. Reflect on how this approach changes the dynamics of the conversation.
Analyze a case study where motivational interviewing was successfully applied. Identify the key elements that contributed to its success. Discuss with your peers how these elements can be adapted to different contexts, such as business negotiations or conflict resolution.
Keep a journal for a week where you apply motivational interviewing techniques in your daily interactions. Document the situations, the questions you asked, and the outcomes. Reflect on how this approach affected your communication and the responses you received.
Participate in a group discussion where each member shares an experience of using motivational interviewing in a real-life scenario. Discuss the challenges faced and the insights gained. As a group, brainstorm strategies to overcome common obstacles in applying this technique.
Attend an interactive workshop led by an expert in motivational interviewing. Engage in hands-on activities that simulate real-world applications of the technique. Use this opportunity to ask questions and receive feedback on your approach to persuasion.
Motivation – The psychological processes that arouse and direct goal-oriented behavior. – Understanding the underlying motivation for a student’s behavior can help educators tailor their teaching strategies effectively.
Interviewing – A method of gathering information through structured or semi-structured conversations, often used in psychological research and assessments. – The psychology professor emphasized the importance of interviewing techniques in gathering qualitative data for the study.
Psychology – The scientific study of the human mind and its functions, especially those affecting behavior in a given context. – In her psychology class, Maria learned about various theories of cognitive development and their implications for education.
Persuasion – The process of influencing someone’s beliefs, attitudes, intentions, motivations, or behaviors through communication. – Effective persuasion requires understanding the audience’s values and presenting arguments that resonate with them.
Reflection – The process of introspection and self-examination to gain deeper understanding and insights into one’s thoughts and actions. – Reflection is a critical component of developing self-awareness and improving decision-making skills in psychology students.
Reasons – The explanations or justifications for actions, beliefs, or phenomena, often used in critical thinking to evaluate arguments. – In critical thinking exercises, students are encouraged to analyze the reasons behind different viewpoints to develop a balanced perspective.
Obstacles – Barriers or challenges that hinder progress towards a goal, often requiring problem-solving and critical thinking to overcome. – Identifying potential obstacles in advance can help individuals develop strategies to achieve their objectives more effectively.
Decisions – The cognitive process of selecting a course of action from multiple alternatives, often involving weighing pros and cons. – Making informed decisions requires evaluating evidence and considering the potential outcomes of different options.
Ownership – The state of taking responsibility and accountability for one’s actions and decisions, often leading to personal growth and empowerment. – Encouraging students to take ownership of their learning can enhance their motivation and engagement in the educational process.
Change – The process of becoming different, often involving adaptation and transformation in response to new information or circumstances. – Understanding the psychology of change can help individuals navigate transitions more effectively and embrace new opportunities.
